“The Secret Life of the Satanic Witch”

22 Dec

It seems WeTV (a channel similar to Lifetime) has gotten pretty damn diverse. I thought it was just cooking shows but they’ve actually got a show about Satanism. Gotta give ’em kudos for giving us the spotlight there, but it would be nice if for once the media could interview someone who truly represented the philosophy.

Oh yeah, I guess that would never happen because as they mentioned at the beginning of the show, most Satanists don’t like to be known. Only the ones who drive Cadillac hearses and are stupid enough to perform rituals on national television.

But hey, to each his own. I have always enjoyed shocking people but I attempt to at least be somewhat classy about it. I’d love to own a hearse, but I don’t think I’d be dropping my kids off at school in it everyday. To me the ideal Satanist has the ability to transform him or herself at a moment’s notice. They get home from their 9 – 5, working as a dentist or customer service rep and break out the bondage gear. They can easily adapt to any situation in order to pursue their agenda.

I’ve seen that the “Satanists” who go around looking like they just stepped out of Hot Topic every day are generally pretty clueless when it comes to adapting the actual principles.  The red and black, the chains, the upside down crosses and pentegrams have become a uniform for an anti-religion that holds individuality in one of the highest regards.

I think people confuse individuality with non-conformity. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a goth girl at heart. I love lacing up a corset, some thigh high boots and watching men swoon. But there’s a time and a place for everything, even being conventional. I absolutely hate having to wear uniforms at work, or dress “nice” for a family event, but I know that if it works to my advantage it is worth the sacrifice. This is a concept that it’s taken me a long time to accept, because I’m the type of girl that honestly thrives off the disapproving looks of religious snobs, but I am glad that I’ve realized it.


Pondering Origins.

22 Dec

Where did it all begin? What was the true genesis? My family, concerened for my eternal soul and such, has obviously had some issues with my recent quest to consciously seek out my own spirituality. I have given up on explaining anything to them because they have their own ideas and I’m not trying to change them. My only concern is to transform my own mind. However I have to say their fantastical religious rantings do give me some points to ponder.

I have realized that I need to develop my own theories on the most basic philosophical questions – particularly that of human origin – in order to truly take control of my mind again, to rid myself of the beliefs embedded by my parents at an age before I was able to reason fairly. To openly claim such an extreme label requires the ammunition of words at the ready when questioned about my beliefs. I certainly do not expect anyone to agree with me but I am striving to educate myself enough to be able to engage in more intelectually stimulating conversations on such topics.

Before claiming this title, the term agnostic seemed to suit me best. It still does in some respects. I always thought the complexities of human anatomy must prove the existence of some higher power or more intelligent being(s). The universe is so vast, it seems ridiculously foolish and self-absorbed to NOT believe there are other places and things out there we have yet to discover and probably never will.

Would it be so insane to think maybe we were created, not in the Christian sense but by other means? As with religious ideals, there has been no tangible evidence that either validates or disproves. Therefore it is equally, if not more valid in my opinion. To me being created by “aliens” sounds much more plausible than being molded like clay by some guy in the sky.

My brother still considers himself Mormon. His arguments are that there is a collective consciousness and that maybe Christ is only the savior of our world but there are different gods for different planets, all under the same supreme rule. I asked him how he could be reading a Zechariah Sitchin book when he’s so fiercely religious. He says he sees the bigger picture, basically that there is more to it than what religion paints but it can all coincide nonetheless.

All I know is, god is dead. The Christian god, at least. The Bible is positively drenched in the blood of innumerable lost lives. It’s amazing to me that so many people can put so much faith, volunteer and violently snatch away so many lives over something thet merely invokes a strong “feeling”. A hunch. Or even worse yet: simply an inherited notion, a fairytale accepted unquestioningly through the ages as divine truth.

Religion is the last place I’m looking for enlightenment.

Writing Rituals

5 Dec

Still alive. I feel an update is necessary as I approach a milestone in my spirituality. I have researched many if not all sects of Satanic “religion” – from the theistic to the LaVeyan. I find that none seem to sit exactly right with me. The basic philosophy of Satanism clicks, particularly the emphasis on an individual search for truth and true knowledge. I find myself particularly fixated on the ritualistic aspects as well. However I do find problems with some parts of the theology and especially the ritualistic wordings.

After jumping way too quickly into rituals, I decided to reluctantly put it aside for a time. I realized that I first needed to know exactly what I was invoking and why. I needed to learn the meanings behind the foreign words. Learn who these beings behind the fancy names really were before calling upon them for help.

I have realized that LaVeyan ritualism commands the forces of darkness to act on your behalf, whereas theistic Satanic ritual tends to be more reverent, inviting them rather than presumptuously commanding. This is why I have chosen to lean more toward spiritual Satanism in ritual. I read somewhere that one should call on infernal beings with reverence, but as if they were familiar friends. This is what I choose to do.

I have also found that the internet is almost useless in learning about Satanism or any pagan school of thought. I have been researching Norse paganism, druidism and even necromancy a bit too. I have found that the best places for study are definitely in books. The internet may contain some answers but for the most part it seems to be a vast pool of misinformation.

Nonetheless, I highly recommend theisticsatanism.com. It seems to have a lot of good insight that includes thoroughly researched essays and tips on writing your own rituals. I believe in future rituals I will be using this invocation rather than the one from The Satanic Bible:

Invocation to Satan


Hail, Satan, Lord of Darkness, King of Hell, Ruler of the Earth, God of this World!
God Who invites us to become as gods!

Muse of our civilization, Dread Enemy of its tyrant god! Satan, mighty Liberator, Bearer of true Light!

God of our flesh, God of our minds, God of our innermost Will!

O mighty Lord Satan, teach us to become strong and wise! Teach us to vanquish the enemies of our freedom and well-being!


I believe I will however stick with the LaVeyan(?) opening “In nomine dei nostri Satanas Luciferi excelsi” because upon employing the use of an online translator I do find it to be agreeable. According to Google, the English translation is “In the name of our God, Satan, Lucifer of the Most High”.


Other recommended links:

Why I don’t recommend LaVey’s rituals (theisticsatanism.com)

A Pact With Satan (spiritualsatanist.com)

Kundalini Yoga

6 Nov

Could kundalini yoga increase ones’ magical energy? Read this page: Satanism and the Kundalini Serpent.

Power in music.

2 Nov

Intense Emotions & Orgasm in Satanic Magic

10 Oct

In the studies of my new spirituality I have learned that intense emotions can be used to get what you want. Growing up with a Chiropractor dad and “Herbalist” mom, I have been exposed to New Age/alternative medicines and therapies of various sorts. My mother is certified to practice Reiki, a Japanese technique centered around the transfer of energy via a metallic wand or “the laying on of hands”.

Previously I had rolled my eyes as soon as I heard someone talking about energy and whatnot. Now I know without a doubt the power we as thinking, feeling humans have within ourselves, we merely have to learn how to use it and channel it in a productive way.

Think about it, how many self-help books are there that talk about visualizing what you want? The Satanic Bible takes this to another level by rather boldly stating that through a process or ritual, one can use emotions – intensified to the highest point possible – and visualization to get what they want in the real world.

I am still learning, but from what I gather thus far the process works through the release of energy and a strong will/intention. Desire is one of the key ingredients to Satanic magic. When one pairs that with the release of energy/emotion, it is “sent out” and one will presumably reap the rewards.

Death is the ultimate release of energy. For obvious reasons, one generally will not get an opportunity to utilize that in ritual. The closest one can come to harnessing that type of energy is through the use of la petite mort: “the little death” (orgasm).

The Satanic Bible contains a Lust Ritual that requires the person performing the ritual to use “whatever means necessary” to obtain the most intense orgasm possible. This clicked with me when I read it, because it makes perfect sense!

Knowing that the energy released through orgasm can be directed in such a way, it makes me wonder how I can utilize other less pleasurable intense emotions in a good way. I’m talking mostly about rage and anger. The next time someone or something really pisses me off, I want to be able to channel that into something useful to me.

I’m still learning and researching. Another post will follow with my findings.

Related Links:



Southern Pagan Presence

10 Oct

Let me preface this by stating that I do realize that not all Satanists would consider themselves Pagan. By definition a Pagan is someone whose religious beliefs deviate from any popular church. I just want it to be known that I do realize that Satanism and Paganism are not necessarily synonymous.

Events of the last few days have done nothing but further instill my belief that I am headed down the right Path. In the very short time I have been knowingly subscribing to these beliefs, I have found that Pagans have been coming out of the woodwork even here in Alabama.

Maybe I had never noticed them before, but it is becoming clear to me that our numbers may not be quite as few as I had originally thought. Last night I met a young Druid who recently came into Priesthood. Being a natural skeptic I at first thought he was full of it, but after speaking with him extensively I found that he really did seem to know his stuff. He told me he had had a vision about me a few days prior to meeting me, had described me to his friends.

Today I went shopping for an athame and was pleasantly surprised to meet another: a very interesting looking woman at a shop. She knew by what I was looking at and buying what I was into. She reminded me that the tools used in ritual are not meant to be depended upon, that many forget they are merely supposed to be used to put one in the right mindset. She had some unique insight into sex magic as well.

When I left the shop, I found myself smiling. It is amazing to make these connections so quickly. Of course I no longer believe there is some “cosmic” force at work, but I am finding it easier to “sniff out” others of a like mind. I’ll spare the corny line “We’re all connected”, but it is strange how like consciousnesses seem to find one another somehow.


8 Oct

When Satan replaces God, the blindfold is discarded!”

This is a concept an elite few can accept or even grasp.

Popular lies have ever been the most potent enemies of our personal liberty. There is only one way to deal with them: Cut them out, to the very core, just as cancers. Exterminate them root and branch. Annihilate them, or they will us!

The Book of Satan: 2.15

I am mine own redeemer.” I have found my true identity, FINALLY! I go now to find God within myself. (Just when I thought all hope was lost…) With time, I will fully eradicate all lies of destructive delusion. It won’t be easy, but I am through with weakness. I have disgusted myself with my pathetic dependence on arbitrary ideas rooted in ignorance. My eyes have been opened. Darkness has become Light and Light Darkness. God is Satan, Satan is God and I am both. I’m never looking back.

Sorry, Jesus… I don’t need or want the teddy bear anymore. I want my fucking liberation. I’m taking my freedom.

It all makes so much more sense. Raised in lies that have cultivated me to resist myself – my true “EVIL” nature – my self-hatred has festered, rotting away my curiosity, ambition and will to live. I now know in my heart of hearts that this is the truth: I am a Satanist. This does not mean I want to sacrifice goats to a horned devil, as I have been deceived to believe. This does not mean I am “converting” religions. I have learned that you cannot “convert” to or “join” the Church of Satan. You are born into it, and had I not been lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time, around the right people, I may never have found the strength I lacked to continue my existence. For me, this is the tool I’ve been desperately needing to begin to love myself.

In the symbol of Satan I gleefully discover the power and self-awareness I have lacked. In blasphemy I find pleasure because I have always hated my enemies. I have been burdened by ignorant guilt, but it is now lifted. I see the world with new eyes that I am unafraid to pronounce “evil”.

Through careful research and self-analysis, I have realized that I have been searching for a mythical prize I was basing my entire life upon: “Love”, “Happiness”… different names, but still mere words, outdated concepts that consume our pathetic lives, obscuring the real Truth. This is something I never could have possibly seen on my own. I would never have dreamed that my very quest for Happiness was the cancer that was destroying me from the inside out! Continue reading

The Becoming: My Vow

8 Oct

No turning back now…


No longer will I hide in shame. No longer will I resist my True Nature. No longer will I miserably wait for some mythical scrap of corrupted, overused, worm-eaten Knowledge, Dead Deity or False Notion to save me. “I am mine own Redeemer”, all others are dead and arbitrary in my Universe. I dedicate myself to myself and no other. From this moment on, I liberate myself of all forced notions of Right and Wrong, Good and Evil. My world has officially been turned upside down, and I will never look back or question my reasoning. What I feel is Law, and that is all. I do not need a reason. My intuition is my best asset against pain.

I own this world. This is MY reality. Those I meet along the way are there for my enjoyment, though I will strive to show respect and responsibility. Though I may grow fond of those I feel deserving, I swear before Satan I will do my best to no longer cheapen myself by allowing other Human Animals in with such frightful abandon. I know now that this is carelessly giving them power over me. I know now that this has caused me much unnecessary pain and useless sorrow. With the aid of his teachings, carefully picked apart and questioned by me, the Supreme God of my own reality – I will become the Burning Star I always wanted to be in secret but never had the courage to earn until this day, 06 October 2011. The Day that marks the beginning of my acceptance of the totality of my existence, with no editing or omissions due to worry for others feelings, acceptance, love or anything else.